The Seven Phases Of RightSizing
As with any journey into the often unknown, you'll need a road map...an emotional GPS as you embark on your voyage of personal discovery. What's key is getting into the physical act of participating in your reinvention process, not just thinking about it or self-actualizing yourself into oblivion. Chances are you've done way too much of that already and in your quest for spiritual enlightenment, you got lost in recrimination which is immobilizing. Only through the physical act of commitment, can faith be rekindled and tested. Without putting faith into physical action, it's just more mental white noise. The Seven Phases listed below, get you physically busy making "change" so that your inherent creativity switch gets turned back on, and you can begin to start re-dreaming about tangible new possibilities as you see physical results. It's like being on a diet, then finally seeing weight loss just at the moment when you were ready to give up. This method of healing from the outside in is a process that I taught millions of viewers to do every day on TV. So trust me, it really does work! More importantly, you'll re-find your most valuable asset; your personal creativity. Once the creativity program gets reactivated, it then unlocks the empathy, forgiveness, faith and inspiration and the ability to dream once again.
Below is a quick snapshot at the process.
healing from the outside, in
Pretend you're spying on a stranger whose house you just broke into. Act like you've never been in there before. Walk through the rooms. Look at everything that "stranger" owns. Open every drawer, every closet, look from the attic to the garage. Ask yourself, by the things you see, who lives here? What do these things reveal? Really ransack the place. Detaching yourself from the fact that these are your things, will have you seeing them in a whole different light. You'll soon find that a narrative about who lives there will begin to emerge. Simply write down those observations. Once done, then ask yourself. " does the narrative of who lives there still match me now...today?" That's it. Don't physically do anything yet. Just let these observations seep in.
Phase 1: Espionage
After a few days reviewing the notes, you've written down, take another pass through each room and re-open every closet and drawer all over again. Re-look at everything now as the owner of those things. Ask yourself, "do I feel burdened by these things, or still happy that I have them?" Many at this stage, feel a bit overwhelmed because it's too much to think about, because the objects begin to trigger memories as you flash on their origins. Information overload starts to set in as you remember that each thing there, you put there for a reason. You once made a choice to have every single thing. You physically went out into your world, found it, and dragged it under your roof, or gave permission for it to be there, whether you bought it or not. But don't recriminate yourself. What is...is! Yes, you sometimes moved things you couldn't decide about, from home to home because you kept postponing this moment...the moment of truth. But focus on the fact that you're getting yourself psyched to re-choose all over again.
Phase 2: Discover Past Choices
Before you delve into the quagmire of your inner world, start by simply looking at the physical square footage each item is taking up. In many cases, $8-$12 dollars a square foot is what you're paying to keep those things. Ask yourself. "is it worth it?" Are these things contributing to your quality of life, or not? Are the choices you refused to make about those things, worth the postponement? Is the fear of re-choosing more about not knowing why you're re-choosing? Or, is it more about the fact, that you've never taken the time to create a new narrative about what you're life could be?
You can't get rid of the life you thought you wanted until you begin to imagine the life you really want. You can't pack for a trip. if you don't know where you're going....right? But you do know if you're leaning towards the South Pacific, that the snow boots and parka aren't cool.
Phase 3: Physical clutter = Emotional apathy
By this point, the walls start crowding in and you remember why you didn't put yourself through this self-purging process in the first place. You may still not be able to make the choices about what should stay in your past, and what should be brought forward into your future, but you can begin to just get rid of the junk. The stuff you haven't used in over a year. So start there. What are the things that you know, right off the bat, that no longer apply even to the life you're currently living? Start by 86-ing the obsolete, chipped, tattered stuff you thought you'd repair, rehab or give away (but you never did). Purge yourself of the stuff you know you (for sure) don't want, first. You'll be surprised how much space you free up. Remember, the facts don't lie. About 48% of what most people own, they actually don't use.
Phase 4: Getting rid of roadkill
The moment you physically take action, you'll feel wobbly, but good. Like having the courage to finally go to the gym, you hate it, but you feel proactive by getting there. Whether you'll ever go back is still TBD. You're still postponing the big decisions, but you'll find as you begin sifting through the junk, that you're inadvertently thinking more about the possibilities of a new life than you think. In the physical act of beginning the purge process, you're opening up the emotional path to your creativity. You're thinking again, even, dare I say, dreaming a little. You're not thinking about actually acting on the spiritual possibilities, but you're physically making room for them. You'll also begin to look at stuff you really do want. The things that may still be essential to you, even if they only have emotional, sentimental value. They're the stuff that trigger the best part of you. Rather then remind you of who you thought you were or wished you'd be, but weren't.
Phase 5: Flipping the creativity switch
As you actually spend more physical time in the process, it starts getting interesting because you're physically seeing tangible results. It's like that moment when you finally get on the scale and realize. "that dang diet is finally working!" It's the rush you'll need to open up even a bigger portal to that personal creativity of yours. It will give you just the right amount of oomph you'll need to start making the real choices, because you'll have already been observing so much about yourself, through the things you own. Now it's time to ask yourself the bigger questions. Are these things worthy of being redefined as my new essentials? Do I need the amount of room I'm paying to keep these things? Or, by getting down to owning only what I need, or what truly makes me happy, can I now start making new choices from a leaner more deliberate point of view?
Phase 6: Finding your mojo
Now you're ready to make some real solid choices about who you were, versus who you want to be. It's time now, to chill for a bit and begin letting your creativity open up a sense of empathy you've misplaced, faith that you've lost, and self-forgiveness you denied yourself. Now you can start the real spiritual reinvention process with the clutter (the apathy) out of your life. Now it's time to start affirming who the hell you really want to be now. This will instigate the harder, tough-love purging phase, as your personal affirmations become greater than the object you're considering saying bye-bye too. Just remember, your new life should not re-create a life you just had, but smaller. Your new life can now be anything you want it to be, no matter how unconventional. Reinvention is about taking what you know didn't work, and leaving it in your past. It's just like choosing friends....while you many have had a history with them, it doesn't mean you need to have a future with them.
Phase 7: The do-over
If you'd like a more step-by-step in-depth version of the above, it's all in my Seven Layers Of Organization book where I take you through the 10 day process moment by moment,